Class Will and Prophecy

SENIOR WILL


We, the undersigned, being slightly confused and totally lacking control of our senses, do solemnly swear that this, the last will and testament of the class of 1964 is totally beyond the comprehension of any normal human being.

  • I, Merle D. Aberle, bequeath my love for typing to John Householder.
  • I, Judith Ann Ahring, will my gladiator’s uniform to Linda Rigsby.
  • I, Spencer Lee Alexander II, leave my PE warm ups to Bobby Craig.
  • I, Robert Keith Anderson, will my expert ability as a chauffeur to Duane Bach.
  • I, Betty Joan Askew, bequeath all my ingrown toenails to Charlie Margherio.
  • I, James Phillip Bach, leave my driver’s license to Danny Thorton.
  • I, Gloria Jean Bachtold, will my P.E. blouse with the padlock snaps to Ellen Fugate.
  • I, Sally Lynne Barnes, bequeath my studious nature to Sandy Zimmerman.
  • I, Ronald Eugene Bartlett, leave my talents as a pool hustler to Ronald Hanley.
  • I, Kittie Arlene Bazzell, will my note collection from English and Study Hall to my sister, Andrea Bazzell.
  • I, Michael Allen Bess, bequeath my pocketful of pencils to Geoffrey Victor.
  • I, Carol Sue Bray, leave my excess weight to Carol Price.
  • I, Sandra Jean Bricker, will my love for P.E. to Diane Reavis.
  • I, Doris Ann Broquard, bequeath my job at the bakery to Susanne Haley.
  • I, Richard Lynn Brucker, leave my mastery of speech to Karen Ellis.
  • I, Deborah Darlene Clemens, will my private parking place to Colleen Bressner.
  • I, Gail June Cox, bequeath my American Problems notes to Elaine Soper.
  • I, Sharon Kay Crews, leave my sociable nature to Sam Bachtold.
  • I, Roger Lynn Dameron, will my ballet slippers to Ervin Van Winkle.
  • I, Paul E. DeFries, leave my beautiful golden tan to Carl Wince.
  • I, Stephen Louis Drach, bequeath my transistorized tachometer to Steve Roth.
  • I, Judith Ann Eaton, will my love for Corvairs to Nancy Zimmerman.
  • I, Ronald Barry Freed, leave my tractor radio to C. A. Lehmann.
  • I, Gayle Arthur Goold, (or is it Jay?) bequeath my reputation as a Romeo to
    James Holforty.
  • I, John Jay Goold, (or is it Gayle?) will my left-handed golf clubs to Steve Baker.
  • I, Patricia Rae Gouge, leave my telephone number to Daniel Mehrkens.
  • I, Sharon Jean Hammond, bequeath all my Beatle magazines to Kathy Vaughan and Sharon Mowery.
  • I, Norman John Harms, leave the care of all my prize dairy cows to Paul Fagot.
  • I, John Vernon Hartman, will my punt-catching powers to Wayne Runyon.
  • I, George Douglas Hibsch, leave my Cadillac taillight lenses to Ronald Rapp.
  • I, Marilyn Kay Hoffman, bequeath my silent nature to Ruth Ann Leffingwell.
  • I, Marjorie Ann Hoffman, will my silly giggle to Phil Paternoster.
  • I, Samuel Dean Hoffman, bequeath my occasional visits to football practice to Terry Vance and Duane Schieler.
  • I, Karen Sue Huette, leave my excellent coordination to Terry Bruley.
  • I, Deborah Jean Johnston, will my 11:00 pill to Carol Lee and Sharon Hancock.
  • I, Gloria Ann Kaeb, bequeath my next door neighbor to Dennis Weber.
  • I, Nicholas Lynn Kaeb, bequeath my love for baseball to John McDonald and
    Bob Cooperider.
  • I, Kenneth W. Kafer, will my allocutionary techniques, my peanut machine, and my hot Olds to Leonard Ferguson.
  • I, John Francis Kennedy, bequeath my senior picture to Susan Hildreth.
  • I, Charles Virgil Leffingwell, leave one ton of limestone to Jim Rigsby.
  • I, David Neil Margherio, will my Lilt home permanent to Darlene Kirchner.
  • I, Carol Elaine McDonald, bequeath my homecoming crown to Robert Travis.
  • I, John Charles Mies, will my crude butchering techniques with a car to David Kaeb.
  • I, Robert James Moore, leave my nickname to Sally Dowlen.
  • I, Edward Eugene Murray, will my Indian headdress to Diana Hall and Wallace Runyon.
  • I, Elaine Doreen Newnam, bequeath my medulla oblongata (more commonly known as the brain) to Ronald Huddleston.
  • I, A. James Ramseyer, leave my sudsy nickname to Sylvia Miller.
  • I, Laura Ann Rawson, will my wicked walk to Art Fosdick.
  • I, Michael Lee Reavis, bequeath my zoo to Jim Steffen and James Leathers.
  • I, Mary Catherine Rigsby, will my talented fingers to Betty Peters.
  • I, Nancy Lee Ross, leave my dry cleaning machine to Gary Walter.
  • I, Linda Lou Roth, will my contact lenses to Joyce Schaffer.
  • I, Samuel Charles Roth, bequeath my comb and mirror to Stanley Boyd.
  • I, Carolyn Maureen Runyon, leave my ’57 Ford lefthand side mirror to
    Pamela Tollensdorf.
  • I, Mary Runyon, will my love for teachers to Janice Treadwell.
  • I, Peter Allen Schaffer, bequeath my insomnia attacks in Civics to Gary Yergler.
  • I, Charles Leroy Scherr, will my height to Buddy Gerber.
  • I, Mary Jean Schuler, leave my Sadie Hawkins “How to do it” book to Jane Woodward.
  • I, Robert Allen Sikorski, bequeath my common American name to Sylvia Schmidtgall.
  • I, Gerald Lee Simpson, will my camping rights on First Street to Jon DeFries.
  • I, Thomas Eugene Smallwood, leave my barber to William Runyon.
  • I, Betty Sue Smith, bequeath my horse ranch to Pat Wiser.
  • I, Harvey William Steffen, will my art work in Civics to Larry Gray.
  • I, Walter Lee Steffen, alias Pooch, leave everything I’ve got to Charles Chico Wenger. Sorry, Charlie, we didn’t leave you much.
  • I, Keith Duane Stephens, bequeath my good-looking brother to Jan Stephens.
  • I, Dale Allen Stoller, leave my dented fender to the Addis sisters, Bobbi and Lynn.
  • I, Diane Carene Tammen, will my prompt Spectator assignments to Kathy Simpson.
  • I, Joyce Ann Thomas, bequeath all my used railroad ties to Claudia Oprondek.
  • I, William Edgar Thomas, will my Beatle haircut to Barbara Roth.
  • I, James Robert Vandegraft, leave my hot-rod motorcycle to Linda Causey.
  • I, Linda Kay Ward, bequeath my long lunch hours to Margie Greenwell and Janice Hines.
  • I, Gail E. Weaver, will my used leg cast to Larry Bartlett.
  • I, Janet Carol Wells, leave my love for English class to Charles Walter and Mary Knapp.
  • I, Kathy Ann Wessel, will my stock in Walton’s Department Store to Diane Huston.
  • I, Patricia Ann Winslow, bequeath my love for Advanced Math to Lyle Mowery and
    Linda Scherr.
  • I, David John Ziegenhorn, will my enlarged vocal chords to James Hieronymus.
  • I, Terry Clifford Zimmerman, leave my degree from the Ben Casey School of Destruction to Tommy Moore.
  • We, the entire class of ’64, bequeath to the entire class of ’65 our drag strip to the cafeteria, our assortment of used casts and bandages, and the south end of the east balcony of the gymnasium.

Mike Bess Jay Goold
Janet Wells Richard Brucker
Doris Broquard Gloria Bachtold

CLASS PROPHECY

  • Dale Stoller, Harvey Steffen, Walt Steffen, and Sam Hoffman have just received the Legion Award for the most prominent citizens of this community.
  • Sharon Hammond has just joined the WAVES as a Judo expert.
  • Leroy Scherr is now a meticulous race car driver for the Revel Model Car Company.
  • Gloria Bachtold has just been hired as a seamstress for the Gym Clothes Company to replace the snaps on P.E. blouses.
  • The beauty of F.C.H.S., Mary Jean Schuler, has just been selected as a finalist in the Mrs. America Pageant.
  • Now we come to a few connections where we find Tom Smallwood still trying to sell his most prized possession, his Comet.
  • John Hartman, of course, is still arguing Civics problems.
  • Nickey Kaeb is running his father’s locker and sells most of his meat to former Miss Carol Bray to feed her six hungry boys.
  • Norman Harms has now graduated from his previous one cast days to two cast days. A great accomplishment on his behalf.
  • Jay Goold is showing his love for women by training female horses.
  • All we’ve found out about Deborah Johnston is, she is still in Viet Nam.
  • Bill Thomas is busy writing an article for the New York Times on Child Psychology.
  • Merle Aberle is a traveling motorcycle salesman along the Nile.
  • Now we come to East Elm Street, the home of Judy Eaton, where she patiently waits for the famous game-hunter in a Safari in deepest Africa, Spencer Alexander.
  • Now in the process of being organized is the Bricker and Brucker Brickworks, founded in 1975 by Sandy and Richard.
  • Gayle Goold is test driver for Mercury Sales. Motto being: “I Crash ‘Em, I Smash ‘Em.”
  • Marjorie Hoffman is the owner of Marjie’s, formerly Harold’s.
  • Head of the Thistle Toothpick Association, Linda Roth, has invented Pop-top toothpicks. Come now, Linda.
  • Douglas Hibsch is making a million dollars selling his super permalube and new 6-speed shift at DX.
  • Elaine Newnam bought a new sewing machine from Mike Reavis, Executive of the Singer Sewing Machine Company, for her new dress factory.
  • Patricia Gouge is raising a fit for just being raised to chief raisin counter of the Post Raisin Bran Corporation.
  • President Margaret Chase-Smith recognized Kay Hoffman for fastest shorthand writer in the world.
  • We find Sharon Crews giving cheerleading lessons to Keith Stephens, the farmer of the year.
  • Betty Askew is moderator of the Program, “Keep Talking.”
  • Mike Bess finished his new novel, “How to be Popular and Make a Million Dollars at the Same Time.”
  • Pete Schaffer, in Detroit, is working for the Sealy Posturpedic Company as a mattress tester.
  • Paul Defries is a multi-millionaire due to his frugality.
  • Robert Moore is the official stand-in lover for Jim Ramseyer.
  • Gloria Kaeb has returned from her trip to Paris, France, as a fashion designer.
  • We now find Ronald Freed, head of Freed’s Wrecking and Rendering Service; he has developed his new motto, “You Stab ‘Em, We Slab ‘Em.”
  • As we look in the future we find Kathy Wessel as a great actress in Hollywood.
  • We now find Carol McDonald, owner and head service-woman of Hicksatomic Gas Station.
  • Ronnie Bartlett is pitching ice-cubes into the water bucket as head waterboy for the New York Mets.
  • Maureen Runyon and Gerald Simpson, we hear through the grapevine, yesterday received contracts for star roles in McKlintock.
  • Mary Runyon is brainus thinkus for the Thinkers Brainless Company.
  • Robert Vandergraft is testing the elasticity of Longline unmentionables.
  • Arlene Bazzell just hit the headlines. This is for receiving her gold watch for her 50th year as carhop at the A. & W. Root Beer Stand in Bloomington. Her boss, also for the 50th year, is the famous Root Beer drinker, Steve Drach.
  • After years of searching the world over, Robert Sikorski has found out where the yellow went. He was instantly put to death by Edward Murray, President of the Pepsodent Company.
  • David Margherio is modeling hair-dos for Pierre’s Beauty Shop for men.
  • Laura Rawson is working at the Blade in the Want-ads Section.
  • Jim Ramseyer is writing a revised edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette Book.
  • We find Bob Anderson and Mary Rigsby conducting Bernstein’s Philharmonic Orchestra every Sunday afternoon at Sunken Park. Their star and first and last bass soloist is Charles Leffingwell.
  • Janet Wells has been promoted from Sales Clerk to floor manager at Walton’s Department Store.
  • Judy Ahring is still buying paper and pens for letter writing to the famous pro-golfer, Lynn Dameron.
  • Deborah Clemens, as a famous beautician, lost her first customer yesterday. Patsy Winslow, housewife, was processed for five hours. Nancy Ross, her assistant, used cottage cheese instead of milk.
  • John Mies owns a collection agency and is still trying to collect his $17 for heat for the Sugar Shack. Most of his collections are due to his generosity.
  • Gail Weaver is now the most exclusive toupee example for having real strawberry blonde hair.
  • Sally Barnes and Betty Smith are bookies for Jim Bach’s famous drag strip.
  • Linda Ward is head beachcomber on a faraway Tahitian Island.
  • Kenny Kafer, President of the NCAA, National Cashew Association of America, has just called in his chief mechanic, Gail Cox, to fix his peanut machines.
  • Terry Zimmerman is now engaged in blowing up Dow Chemical Company, with Doris Broquard, his assistant roof raiser.
  • Sam Roth is the principal of the Illinois School of Charm.
  • John Kennedy, at the old age of 28, is still fighting the 11:00 curfew.
  • Diane Tammen and Joyce Thomas own T. & T’s Bar and Grill where they specialize in anything.
  • We find David Ziegenhorn taking Dick Beondies old job over, as a disc-jockey for W.L.S. Radio. P.S. He just got fired.
  • Karen Huette has just changed occupations, from a beautician to a bee-hive builder. She got this idea from the latest hair fashions.

Home | About us | Pictures | Will and Prophecy | Contact Us